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#88353 What's on your mind? (WOYM)

Posted by Woozles on 07 June 2015 - 09:41 AM

It's been one year today since I last binged and/or purged. :o :)
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#88608 What's on your mind? (WOYM)

Posted by Imaginary on 09 June 2015 - 09:20 AM

I passed my final uni exams...  I don't know how to feel  :o  

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#115664 the reason I came back

Posted by TinyButterfly on 12 March 2016 - 08:49 AM

last night I was reading an article about succesful people having only a limited amount of clothes.

I was thinking then I should clean out my closet and I came to the conslusion that I'm finally ready to get rid of my thin-clothes!

for me that's my final step in recovery I think (I'm a hoarder)




that wasn't exactly something I could post on my FB-wall haha

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#30497 Apologies

Posted by Admin on 31 August 2014 - 11:18 PM

Hey everyone,


I just wanted to apologies for my level of activity here.


Pretty much as soon as I opened up the new forum things took a downward spiral for me in terms of where Im at mentally.  Ive found a decent therapist now (one that isn't more crazy then me that is!) and hopefully I start feeling more optimistic about the future and I can devote more time to improving this place which is something important to me.


I do promise that I will get my shit together and still try and introduce features that will improve this place and also work on getting problems fixed so members can also use this forum easily on their chosen platform.


Im also very sorry for the people that have pm'ed me and have not received complete replies to their msg's.


I will improve things. I promise.


Thank you to everyone that has provided their input into glitches and also their ideas on features that they think will improve the forum.  Please don't ever hesitate to continue contacting me with issues and ideas. Things aren't great at the moment (Still better then President Obamas beige suit) but I can handle it and sometimes its good to have a distraction


Im locking this thread because I don't want to be an attention seeker, but just wanted people to know whats happening.




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#98245 Where is everybody?

Posted by RingoDarling on 30 August 2015 - 08:56 AM

A decade ago (a decade and a half ago), the forum began. Many on here have been around since then. The forum is literally aging. With age comes more responsibilities. More time has allowed people the space needed to heal from many of their troubles and to in many ways move on with their lives. Or people are still sick as fuck but no better than to post on the internet about it. 

Plus newbs tend to feel immediately like they don't fit in due to so many of the members having already "known" each other for so long and it's hard for them to feel welcomed when they actually have to sort of put themselves out there. Which is much harder to do in this mode of the forum, where everyone is so freaked out by being triggered, saying the wrong thing, upsetting someone else OR says whatever they say and offends someone and thinks that person is an idiot and KABOOM. Mods locking threads that escalated way too quickly because aren't we all just fragile delicate souls who break and express that breakage by name calling or long diatribes about exactly how and why and the extent of their offended feelings. 

Also, maybe, there's just nothing to say. This place began when the digital realm was a bit less than now. There was no facebook, instagram, twitter, snapchap, vine, post secret, etc. Everyone was suffering in silence, alone and found this forum and used it to reach out when there was no other way. 
Now there are other ways to feel connected. 


Which, connections here are slow. Due to the forum being a sort of, "post something... come back in a day or two or 365 and see the responses" it can probably be a mindfuck for those used to such instant response modes which happen with social media. 

As a creature of habit who found a sort of peculiar comfort zone here, I return. I shall return again and again, even if it's just to occasionally snoop when someone I've been encountering for the past many odd years pops into my mind for whatever reason. 


Also the games section is fun. :) 


If you want more content, add more content. :D 

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#56497 Ok guys...

Posted by shenanigans on 20 December 2014 - 09:10 PM

I feel like even making this thread is ridiculous but it seems I need to. Obviously you can see there's been a bit of some issues/tension going on here. Sadly I thought I had it under control by addressing it here...along with Sheryl and Kye...but that seems to not be the case because I'm now checking other threads and there's posts that are continuing to fan the flames.
Stop it.
I'm not going to name names. You all know who you are.

If you don't know the history behind this forum...then ask. Don't assume. Don't get all pissy when it's pointed out to you. Don't make snarky comments regarding that. If you have an issue...pm an admin or mod. That's part of why we are here.

Do not attack a member in their diary or elsewhere. Period.
It's rude, pathetic, and just plain ridiculous. There's never a need for it. And it is ground for a strike.
Remember...3 strikes and you're out. For good.

So please guys...keep it civil. As you guys all know...Aaron is quite busy with the spammers right now. But he has put in a lot of work on this board. Making it really nice for all of you. Don't trash it by being mean to each other.

If you have any questions...pm me. I'll check in frequently.
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#39120 What's on your mind? (WOYM)

Posted by CoffeeJunkie on 14 October 2014 - 05:06 PM

All my effort in controlling my diabetes played off today, with the news that my hba1c is now 6.5%! It should be under 7 for good long term control and in the past has been higher than 14, which is shockingly bad. (The numbers are a different measurement to normal bm readings)
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#25882 Missing members

Posted by Mikki on 14 August 2014 - 02:42 AM

I'm here, but I can't find the emoticons!
I don't know if I took a break or if I'm back or anything, but I am here right now. I'm alive and same but different too, I'm ok. I am sorry if I worried anyone. I have indeed been doing a lot of traveling and I'm currently living out of a suitcase but it's temporary.
Best wishes <3
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#19900 Saw this and thought it may apply to a lot of us...

Posted by maggiemay on 24 July 2014 - 12:33 PM



Wasn't sure where to put it... But hey, go you! Plus cute owl.

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#126621 From someone who is "recovered"...

Posted by lushelocution on 12 September 2016 - 03:16 AM

Hey guys and gals.

I'll try to keep this as brief as I can.

I joined this community when I was in high school when the site was rgp. I was constantly oscillating between anorexia and bulimia, and while I spent much of my time lurking on the site, I made many friends. I cannot thank you all enough for the support that I was given through my hardest times.

Even though I rarely posted, especially in the following years, my eating disordered behavior never ceased. I would go months with serious bulimic tendencies and then months of anorexia. My weight was always pretty low, but as of the end of 2014 I had reached my lowest and my health was in serious danger. At some point I knew I had reached a point of potential no return ; and I was strangely ok with the possibility of death.

I can't tell you it was a precise moment that I decided to seriously consider recovery. I don't think it was. It took a year of gradually learning to retrust my own body to normalise.

I'm writing this post to let you know that it wasn't easy. It was painful. Mentally painful, physically painful. The bloating felt like it would never go away. There were days where I felt like I was the hugest person on the planet. Water retention, constant nausea and heartburn, the endless fighting of anxieties... but for every pain and failure I tried to hold onto the good goals I reached. Like, a finished meal with no guilt. A holiday evening with family filled with happy banter instead of harassment about my weird eating habits. A successful date night where I enjoyed the entire time we spent together, instead of focusing on calories and numbers.

I tried to keep myself motivated by reminding myself that this is the only life I have, and if I wanted to do any good for myself and others, I would have to keep on trying.

I feel like now, even though I'm not entirely 100% recovered, my mindset is completely different. I feel comfortable with my heathy weight. I feel comfortable eating a normal amount and putting the rest away for later if I need to. I don't have the overwhelming urges to binge and purge.

I don't know what advice, if any, I have for anyone considering recovery, but I'll just say this -- your life is worth living well and happy. It's perfectly ok to love yourself for the beautiful person you are.

It's a difficult road, and it's long and arduous, but it's worth it. I swear.

Love to you all. <3
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#117585 What's on your mind? (WOYM)

Posted by Mikki on 31 March 2016 - 11:29 AM

I got my first A! (Well, first A on a university exam that is) This made me really happy, I finally beat my Bs. I keep thinking I will fail and then I obviously don't. Why is it so hard to really believe that I can. I mean I know I can (but still it's hard to really believe) and my focus wasn't even on grades (I love learning!), I worked hard and it pays. But I doubt too much sometimes and the doubt tricks me to think I want to run away and give up cause I feel stupid and anxious. But if you stay it won't always be horrible.
Running away is the fail, and that is totally up to me and totally on me. So hah yeah
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#108587 MiSu 2015 recap

Posted by Wednesday on 30 December 2015 - 07:18 AM

One of my goals for the year was to stop biting my finger nails :) Haha! If anything, I've gotten worse at this...


But I've done lots of things positively mental health wise: 


1) Maintained my 'recovery weight' for at least 6 months

2) Worked on my sleep heaps and heaps and heaps- my insomnia is SO MUCH BETTER (I found it very psychologically difficult to try and deal with this issue... there were few people who understood what I was going through and ever fewer who supported me to make changes). 

3) I've got a social life! No kidding! Since most of the ED and insomnia is gone, I've found friendships easier and easier to form... I think I'm much more easy going now... it's been fantastic (but expenseive) :P These last 6 months, I feel like I've finally found the life I was looking for <3

4) I'm working full time- for the first time ever. I've never been able to work full time before, I've only ever worked part time. To be honest, I'm struggling with full time work... but I'm very pleased with myself that I've given it a good shot, and that even if I can't do this, I at least wanted it. (Before the idea of working was too overwhelming to deal with). 


The year hasn't been all good, I don't want to make everyone think that I just suddenly got better and now everything is peachy... I still have to work at things every day... but I feel functional, I feel a part of society... I really didn't know if I would ever get there. 


What about you April? 

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#107714 What's on your mind? (WOYM)

Posted by Mikki on 20 December 2015 - 02:52 AM

Got my exam results, much better than I thought! Dreaded getting the results, but I did really well! Can't quite believe I managed this semester but I did :) :)

(Eta still waiting for one, nervously )
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#103240 Halloween Muahahahah*cough*ha. 2015 Costumes

Posted by april_rain on 29 October 2015 - 04:02 AM

Here are some pictures!


Pink Fluffy Unicorn:
Nyan Cat:

Fairy Princess:
DSC06306_zps2beh9shw.jpg DSC06309_zpspcqhbksr.jpg DSC06310_zpsv122prft.jpg

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#81016 What's on your mind? (WOYM)

Posted by Mikki on 16 April 2015 - 04:59 AM

And I've applied to uni again[emoji55] Idk if I'll be able to start, or where!, but at least I'm trying to think about a future.. Hoping for something. Scared but I'll never know unless I try, and I've truly got very little to lose. We'll see. If I'm alive I will try. [emoji28]
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#80021 New Members to the Forum please read

Posted by Admin on 09 April 2015 - 08:29 AM

Due to the spamming situation and their insatiable appetite for the "General" board, you now have to have at least one post before you can post in this section.  Another reason why its best to introduce yourself in the "Introductions" board

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#57631 Merry Christmas to you all!

Posted by CoffeeJunkie on 24 December 2014 - 01:06 PM

Just wanted to say I hope you all have a good Christmas!
It's an incredibly challenging time for anyone with any kind of mental health issues, especially for those who have an eating disorder.

I hope that those of you who feel lonely at this time are able to reach out and feel it less so.
I hope those of you with eating difficulties are able to eat what you are comfortable eating/drinking without pressure or guilt.
I hope those that have challenging families manage to find some peace and love.
I hope those of you of find being around lots of people difficult can get through without too much or any anxiety.

I love you all.
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#54929 Rant about Christmas time!

Posted by Fairy on 16 December 2014 - 06:16 PM

*sets up camp in this thread*


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#126863 Missing members

Posted by Mikki on 19 September 2016 - 09:15 PM

I'm ok! Thanks <3
I've been in hospital all summer, but today I was discharged! It was unhelpful.. The situation was not good, until just recently when I was allowed back at uni and given more freedom.. and then they lifted the section finally! So I'm free (ish), and I have moved to a new place (finally). I'm really tired now.. 3 months summer is over I am not much better, but I learned some things and met lots of good and weird people.. And now I'm alone and Life goes on .. Hey.
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#113380 What's on your mind? (WOYM)

Posted by Starburst on 19 February 2016 - 12:54 AM

I'm so fed up of the fake recovery movement that has cropped up on the internet over recent years. Rambling on about your anorexia 'recovery' and whilst simultaneously finding raw veganism and discovering a love of 10 mile runs is not bloody recovery! Even more so, these people are always low weights, just not deathly low weights anymore. They parade around like social media heroes, giving false hope to people still in the clutches of their ED. The image they give to those vulnerable and ill people is; "oh look you can be recovered while staying dangerously thin and eating tofu all day long, yay recovery!!". Far be it for me to put down the progress they have made from their lowest points. However, I hate the pretence that this is what a healthy recovered person looks and acts like.

This all stems from me seeking some support online because actually, I do want to recover. There just doesn't seem to be a place for a fat bulimic in the parade of super dooper fit and healthy vegans who run. I shall patiently await my therapist's return from her 4 week break and avoid those people like the plague.
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